Creating a Better Future With Ryan Hartley

Ryan Hartley is Chief Heart Officer at Always Better Than Yesterday (ABTY), which exists to help develop heart-centred leaders, teams, organisations and communities to reach their potential and make a positive impact on the world. ABTY is a heart-led organisation built on the belief that real leadership is the act of putting your own needs aside to serve others. ABTY shares this philosophy through coaching a heart-centred model and developing courses to lead its clients from the heart to how we think and make decisions through how we serve people and onward to how we leave a positive impact on our communities. 
In this episode John and Ryan talk about how he came to be a coach, the definition and modern placement of the word ‘love’, the modern absence of heart-sensitive men in the workplace, his relationship problems, finding faith, love languages, self-care and self-love. 
KEY TAKEAWAYS

Ryan took a job with his police force as a Dispatcher and became a parent as well as a Manager. Through these two roles, he developed his enthusiasm and interest in Leadership which he felt was about serving other people rather than the rank-and-file type established in the police force.
From coaching part-time Ryan is now training people full-time through consulting, coaching, community leadership and podcasting in the concept of helping people be better than yesterday. 
Our workplaces are full of self-serving leaders. That is an abuse of power, true leadership is about serving and protecting. 
Our panic-based fight or flight response restricts our ability to choose a response in situations. Constant stress means unconsidered decisions based on emotion.
If we can bypass our childhood learned patterns we can understand others’ learned patterns also and see things more clearly and respond in a more logical, thoughtful manner.
Time to ourselves is essential to be the best version of ourselves to other people. 

BEST MOMENTS
‘I guess I just describe myself as a curious human being. When I was a kid I must have watched all of the serial killer profiles. It led me to want to know more about people. I’ve always been curious about his topic of psychology.’ – Ryan 
‘In a lot of cases it seemed like following orders for the sake of following orders and that didn’t sit with me very well either. Tell me about that and how it may have impacted on you.’ – John
‘I think that is what a masculine man when he has love in his heart is willing to do. He is honourable, he is noble, he will create safety for those around him and he will be willing to serve and sacrifice himself should he be required to.’ – Ryan 
‘Isn’t it funny that we don’t say “I love you with all of my mind”? So I’ve come to understand that emotion and love is deeper than thinking. I can’t force myself to think I love you. I can’t force myself to think that I value the company values.’ – Ryan 
‘The mind is never supposed to be the leader. The mind is always supposed to be the servant. It is the heart that leads the way.’ – Ryan 
‘The minute we wake up someone wants something from us. So we have to factor in some time, particularly as men and as dads, and in doing so realise that other people get a better version of us.’ – Ryan 
‘That’s the problem with human beings, they’re so conditional. When we try to receive love from another human being it's generally conditional and yet self love and acceptance needs to be unconditional.’ – Ryan 
GUEST RESOURCES
Website: www.abty.co.uk
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alwaysbetterthanyesterdayuk/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ABTYUK
Podcast: www.abty.co.uk/podcast
VALUABLE RESOURCES
Link to my workshop -  
https://www.johnkennycoaching.com/5- things-you-need-to-create-a-healthy-loving-relationship/
To get in touch - email – 
john@johnkennycoaching.com
 or book a complimentary call – 
https://calendly.com/johnkennycoaching/30min
If people want to order a copy of the book then they can just pay postage of £4.95 (RRP £8.99) - www.johnkennycoaching.com/podcast-book-offer
Want to be able to address the relationship issues in your life? - Why not book in for a complimentary call and we can discuss how you can get the new started with some new types of relationships - https://calendly.com/johnkennycoaching/30min
The Relationship Guy Podcast - https://omny.fm/shows/the-relationship-guy        
ABOUT THE HOST
I am John Kenny, Award Winning Relationship Coach.Coaching people to experience healthy loving relationships. Having spent a life choosing unhealthy relationships and self sabotaging my own success, I now coach people to live a life they choose.
CONTACT METHOD
Facebook – 
https://www.facebook.com/johnkennycoaching

LinkedIn – 
https://www.linkedin.com/in/john-kenny-coaching

Insta – 
https://www.instagram.com/johnkennycoaching/

Twitter – 
https://www.twitter.com/johnkennycoach}

YouTube - 
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCHTj9x6Tlo7lcIJITyx-tgQ
Clubhouse - @relationshipguy