A Man's Guide To Ending Shame

Talking points: psychology, shame, mindset

Trying so hard not to reference the bell ringing lady in Game of Thrones right now. Seriously though, a lot of us let shame run our lives. There are legitimate reasons why, but it doesn't have to stay that way. Listen in for how it starts, why it's so hard to clear, and ten (yes, ten!) thing you can do to break free.

(00:00:00) - Intro and how to better define shame
(00:03:30) - Why shame is so hard to get rid of: it’s natural, and its has a somatic component
(00:08:16) - It also can reinforce trauma. Here’s how they get connected
(00:13:52) - Shame as a source of safety
(00:18:36) - Understanding the physical side of shame
(00:23:21) - What does NOT help
(00:25:51) - When to seek professional help
(00:26:59) - Ten ways to move through shame. First one? Use curiosity to challenge it
(00:30:32) - Mindfulness skills, reframing, and separating personhood from behaviour
(00:35:00) - Putting the same in context, treating as a belief vs identity, and putting blame where it belongs
(00:40:01) - Finding an alternative story, and practicing expressing boundaries and assertiveness

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