Bringing It to Life #1: Navigating High Conflict Mediation Part Two

In this episode of It's All Your Fault, Bill and Megan continue their "Bringing It to Life" series with special guest Elaine Richardson, a solicitor and mediator from the UK. Continuing their conversation from the previous episode, they dive deep into the challenges of managing high conflict personalities in family law and mediation, offering practical strategies for professionals and individuals alike.Identifying High Conflict PersonalitiesThey discuss the importance of considering three possibilities when faced with accusations of high conflict behavior: the allegation may be true, it may be a projection, or both parties may be engaging in high conflict behavior. They emphasize the need for professionals to maintain an open mind and avoid blindly believing one party's claims.Navigating High Conflict Clients and MediationElaine shares her experiences as a solicitor and mediator, highlighting the importance of setting clear boundaries with high conflict clients. She discusses strategies for managing difficult situations, such as challenging clients when necessary and recognizing the "personality in waiting" that may emerge during the process.Effective Communication StrategiesBill talks again about the BIFF (Brief, Informative, Friendly, Firm) communication method as a tool for managing high conflict interactions. He explains how using BIFF can help de-escalate tensions and encourage mirror behavior from the other party. Elaine and Bill also discuss the importance of focusing on behavior rather than labels when addressing high conflict individuals.Questions we answer in this episode:How can professionals identify high conflict personalities?What strategies can solicitors and mediators use to manage high conflict clients?How can individuals communicate effectively with high conflict people?What role does setting boundaries play in managing high conflict situations?Key Takeaways:Maintain an open mind when faced with accusations of high conflict behaviorSet clear boundaries with high conflict clientsUse BIFF communication to de-escalate tensions and encourage positive mirror behaviorFocus on behavior rather than labels when addressing high conflict individualsBe prepared for the "personality in waiting" to emerge during the processThis episode of It's All Your Fault offers invaluable insights for professionals and individuals navigating the challenges of high conflict personalities in family law and mediation. Bill, Megan, and Elaine provide practical strategies and real-world examples that listeners can apply to their own situations, making this a must-listen episode for anyone seeking to manage high conflict interactions more effectively.Links & Other NotesBOOKSBIFF for LawyersOur New World of Adult BulliesTRAININGNew Ways for MediationHigh-Conflict Mediation Lecture and DemonstrationMediation in Domestic Violence CasesCOACHINGShared Parenting Scotland (coaching + class for anyone in the UK)Pre-mediation coaching(for anyone prior to mediating)Workplace coaching (for executives/leaders; employees; HR; anyone)ARTICLESThe CARS MethodHow to Write a BIFF Response®Our website: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/Submit a Question for Bill and MeganAll of our books can be found in our online store or anywhere books are sold, including as e-books.You can also find these show notes at our site as well.Note: We are not diagnosing anyone in our discussions, merely discussing patterns of behavior.
(00:00) - Welcome to It's All Your Fault
(00:33) - Part 2 with Elaine Richardson
(01:46) - Approaching a Potential High Conflict Mediation Case
(05:55) - Three Possibilities of the Case
(10:22) - When Your Client Is High Conflict
(19:46) - Handling High Conflict Between Lawyers
(27:42) - New Law in UK
(32:16) - Shared Parenting Scotland
(34:59) - Wrap Up
(36:19) - Reminders & Coming Next Week: Workplace Conflict

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